The reasons why any woman would choose to make an adoption plan for their unborn child vary. There really is no classic scenario, no matter what the movies and TV have to say. This is Rachel. Her story is as unique as her.
“Hi, my name is Rachel, and I’m a proud birth mother of twins and an adoptee myself. I chose to place them for adoption in 2021. The decision to place them changed the trajectory of my life! Choosing adoption was very difficult, which lead me to seek outside help. In doing so, I have begun to heal, grow and learn about who I am. These changes have made me realize that I want to impact the adoption world and advocate for everyone in the adoption Triad. I want to lead by example of the powerful change that selfless love can make. Even though choosing to place was agonizing and paralyzing, it was the most courageous and selfless decision that I could have made due to my circumstances. I want to share with others that overcoming the emotional pain and having peace and happiness is possible.
As much as I wanted to be a mother, there were several obstacles preventing that. I was actively using drugs, struggling with mental health issues, and on SSI due to a traumatic head injury and their father was absent. There was pressure to both keep and choose adoption, which caused me confusion. I eventually tuned people’s opinions out and sought help from God. As I write this article, I’m 2 and a half years sober and getting help for the other issues I have struggled with. The twins are my motivation for these changes!
I want to be an example of strength, hope, and resilience that will make my twins proud of who I am.”
There Are No Stereotypes For Birth Mothers
What makes one woman choose adoption may not be the same for the next one. We can’t pre-decide who should have the adoption conversation and who shouldn’t. Adoption is not the right choice for everyone, but it can certainly be the right one for some. No matter what the circumstances, she gets to decide.
Many women who are thinking about adoption for their unborn child are fearful of talking to an adoption agency because they do not understand when a conversation about adoption becomes a commitment that they cannot turn back on. The reality is, women can change their minds about their adoption plans at any time before birth, and in some states, even after for a designated time called The Revocation Period.
There is no paperwork at any agency or adoption attorney office that she may sign for services that require her to follow through. She is in the driver’s seat of her decision at all times.
Likewise, some women are committed to their decision to parent only to decide after birth that they would like to make an adoption plan for their child instead. In either case, the decision is being made based on what the expectant mother feels is best for her and her child. Neither one makes her a bad mother or unfit to be one. Parenting decisions have to be weighed carefully when there are extenuating circumstances involved in the decision. These are the conversations best had with a qualified adoption agency, licensed in the expectant mother’s state, that is committed to helping women make the right choice for them.
What Choosing to Make An Adoption Plan Looks Like
One of the scariest calls any expectant mom can make is to an adoption agency to discuss her options. The questions swirl and sometimes fear can override the need. If you would like a no-pressure discussion about how to make an adoption plan to help you decide if adoption is the right choice for you can your child, please contact us today for an honest, no-commitment, no-pressure discussion.