When an Expectant Mom makes an adoption plan, it involves a lot of consideration. No one goes into this lightly. There can be a lot of reasons why an Expectant Mom would make an adoption plan. The scenarios behind why they choose adoption varies greatly, contrary to popular opinion. Expectant Moms making an adoption plan will usually approach the process with trepidation and a lot of questions. With this in mind, Expectant Moms making an adoption plan really do need to see the support of a Birth Mother AKA someone who has been there.
No one can ever fully prepare her for what it will be like to execute an adoption plan. There are so many unknowns that an Expectant Mom making an adoption plan can face. And while it is impossible to prepare someone for something they have never experienced before, a person who has been down the road they’ve decided to walk on is a much better resource than someone who is just sharing information.
Expectant Moms Making An Adoption Plan Need Real Facts
There is one school of thought that Expectant Moms should just focus on a healthy pregnancy and not worry about what is to come. While one can see the case for that in an emotional sense, making an adoption plan is a life-changing decision with life long implications. It is the unknowns around adoption that keep Expectant Moms making an adoption plan up at night.
Birth Mothers are the perfect resource for helping Expectant Moms understand what they could be facing if they move forward with their adoption plan. Who better to tell her what she should consider than a woman who has made the decision before her?
Some adoption agencies shy away from Expectant Moms talking to Birth Mothers for fear that she will say something to dissuade her from moving forward. This is usually not the case. Most Expectant Moms making an adoption plan find great comfort in the wisdom of a Birth Mother.
If an Expectant Mom is not offered the opportunity to speak to a Birth Mother Mentor through her agency, she should ask to speak to a Birth Mother that placed with them before. It shouldn’t be an issue to speak to a former client. If she meets resistance, she should seek other representation. Every Expectant Mom making an adoption plan has the right to thoroughly examine her choice before she picks a family for her child. A Birth Mother Mentor can do a lot for her in feeling either confident in her decision or armed with the right information to make another choice.
Good Birth Mother Mentors Are Balanced About Adoption
For Expectant Moms making an adoption plan, finding the right Birth Mother to talk to about her adoption plans is important. Many agencies who have Birth Mother Mentors have already vetted them for their emotional health and their ability to be a mentor. These Birth Mothers have been able to process their grief and loss in a healthy way. Birth Mother Mentors may not have all had the best experience with adoption, but they are able to articulate what went wrong and what to help someone avoid in the future without inserting their story into an Expectant Mom’s journey who is considering adoption. Being able to be a good listener and to be impartial to the decision of an Expectant Mom are two key indicators of a solid Birth Mother Mentor.
For Expectant Moms Working With Private Attorneys
Some Expectant Moms making an adoption plan work with private attorneys instead of adoption agencies for some reason or another. This doesn’t mean she should not expect to speak to a former client of theirs before she makes a decision to move forward with an adoption plan. Every Expectant Mom reserves the right to talk to former clients to make sure she is working with the right attorney or firm for her. They should be happy to furnish contact information for former clients. If not, beware.
If you are working with a private adoption attorney and would like to know what the differences are in working with an adoption agency versus a private adoption attorney, contact us today for a consultation. We can even put you in touch with a Birth Mother Mentor, no matter who you work with on your adoption plan.